Inside Puppywishes

Adam's Mother

"Poverty has nothing to do with money, it has to do with the way people feel about themselves. I live in the ghetto, but I am a rich woman."

- from Patricia's diary

By Adam Stone

Creating this web page is perhaps one of the most difficult endeavors I have ever assigned myself.  Why? Because it involves the most tender subject in my life; my mother, Patricia Cole

My mother never had a happy moment in her life. She was a sad lyric, perhaps the most sad lyric that was ever sung. Yet, under all her sadness, their was a voice and soul that raised itself above the crowed, and presented a beautiful song to the world.

My mother endured almost every hardship that every woman wishes to avoid. She was a victim of rape, terrible domestic abuse, abandonment, racism and poverty. And when she finally believed that she had set herself free from hardship, her first born son was abducted and removed from her life.

My youngest sister, Joey, was first called a 'dirty nigger' when she was only five years old. Deeply upset, little Joey ran to her mother for help. My mother quickly pulled together what little money she had and purchased my sister a Wonder Woman bathing suite. My mother then told Joey that she was not a 'dirty nigger', rather, she was "Wonder Woman". You can see by the smile on my sisters face (pictured left) that my mother did the right thing.

Notwithstanding all of the dreams that my mother was not able to achieve in her own life, she never lost her ability to dream with her children. Notice, I write, "dream WITH her children" and not 'dream FOR them.'

When I first told my mother that I wanted to be a great dog trainer, she responded by giving me the money to print my first business cards: I was only ten years old at the time. Greater than this, no matter how ambitious I became, no matter how high the obstacle or deep the discouragement, my mother always supported my dreams.

Patricia lived long enough to see the birth of her first grandson, Mathew, a grandchild that lit up her life.

No matter how wonderful my mother made life for me and the people around her, she suffered terrible depression as the result of having lost her eldest son. This depression lead to a eating disorders and an addiction to prescription medication, two problems that ultimately lead to her death. She died before she was fifty years old. But she did not die alone, all of her children sat around her bed and helped her pass onto the next world.

I remember the last words we shared.

I whispered in her ear: "You must be scared?"

She nodded yes.

I then said; "Are you scared of dying, or leaving us alone."

She mumbled; Leaving you alone.

Then I spoke the last words she would ever hear;

I said; "Mothers like you never leave their children alone. We will be just fine."

God Be With You Mom,

Thank you for all the help you gave

and continue to give.

Your youngest Son - Adam Stone